I woke up today feeling pretty good. Ambitious even. Ready to take on the world. I was gonna shake off the grogginess, finish my taxes, maybe write a great song- something both catchy & meaningful. I made myself a healthy, protein-packed veggie omelet. I got on my computer, started working on a project and....
Fast-forward 6 hours. I'm in my dark room, propped up on pillows in bed with my laptop sitting open in my lap. I'm halfway into another episode of my latest Netflix binge. My breathe smells like chocolate & sweet potato chips (slightly less unhealthy than regular potato chips!...). I haven't done anything, haven't gotten any exercise, haven't even looked outside all day long. I smell like I haven't showered in days. Maybe I haven't. I keep refreshing my Facebook feed, feeling anxious, like I'm missing out on something.
I feel numb.
I feel the opposite of victorious.
So much for that breakfast of champions.
In all honesty I don't know exactly what happened between my hopeful rising and my disheartened afternoon state. It was like the loser, the lazy, self-serving, hopeless side of me decided to check in, & made some executive decisions that I wasn't gonna do anything that felt that took any ounce of effort. I feel like I was two different people today. Was that guy who had productivity and excitement on his mind really me?
Maybe you can relate. Maybe you've felt this same shift in momentum, started out your day with an attitude of kicking butt and taking names and ending feeling like the only butt you kicked was your own.
Sometimes it feels like we just check out.
Sometimes human nature takes over. And I let it.
Sometimes I give sentences their own line for dramatic effect. (Had to add a some comic relief haha ;))
There's really no moral to this story, no redeeming quality or charming point to be made. It's just a page out of my messy real life book. Sorry to be a downer but that's just the way it is. I guess if there's anything I want to point out, it's that our choices really do define us. And that a breakfast of champions can only carry you so far. Maybe they should make dinner wheaties...